Dancing with an Audience

There is a wonderful idiom we use, “dance like nobody is watching”, that is a cliché bit of life advice.  Still, most clichés only come about out of the basis of truth, and upon examination it would seem living uninhibited is a good course of action.  It takes more than a quote to fully understand the concept of uninhibited life however, it takes a moment.  You don’t take things people say to heart until proving them to yourself.  Upon recollection there wasn't a time I danced like nobody was watching, in fact, it was usually the opposite; I would dance in places where one feels like EVERYONE is watching.  I was always moving very consciously, with a sense of deliberation to my movements.  I later realized I lived my life that way, deliberately.  Even my quest to embrace spontaneity was a deliberate one, a terrible paradox which is silly to even propose as effective.  One night however, I danced without thinking; I existed in the moment for the sake of existing in it, not pursuing any sort of goal or agenda.

  It started with a conversation, a simple greeting to a stranger on their stoop that cold Saturday night.  Finding ourselves the last of our group outside the party, my friend Ben and I began to speak with the interesting characters that had spread themselves about the stairwell of the apartment complex.   They were an eclectic bunch, in the best sort of way, psychedelic rock music blasted out of their room, an awesome break to the monotony of party music that usually bombarded the sound space of Isla Vista on a weekend. 

The first person I spoke with was a bearded man whose name has slipped my mind, and what was most striking to me was the way in which he listened.  While we spoke, he focused his eyes very intently at the ground, periodically nodding and waiting until you were fully finished with your side of the conversation before engaging in his own.  I had the feeling he truly processed every word I said that night, and I wish I could say the same on my part, (this is now a mental note to become a better listener…).  He spoke with a soft voice, in an intellectual manner, yet not the sort of intellectualism one associates with pretentiousness.   It was more so with an air of curiosity and excellent diction.  His friends were equally interesting, a girl with black hair whose passion for life seemed to make everything that happened far too overwhelming, and her reactions followed suit; they were intense, full of life.  There was a tall stern faced man as well, who spent most of the time with his girlfriend, he didn't say a word other than his name, but his mannerisms were exceedingly inviting and friendly.  Lastly there was Alex who, “looks like Jesus!” according to an unbiased third party (a drunk girl).

  

After standing in the cold, talking about nothing and everything at the same time, we decided to move into their upstairs apartment.  Upon entering, the music that was pleasantly emanating outside turned into a blaring noise, previously blocked by the actual structure inside.  A computer lay on the floor of the bathroom, connected to speakers in the other room.  On the floor lay boxes filled with thousands upon thousands of burnt CD’s, more music than I could have even fathomed.  Ben and I spent the next ten minutes or so mingling with the group, and despite being the only outsiders to this click of friends, we felt quite in place.  We talked about drugs, life, and just appreciated existence together.  After some time, I went up to Alex and outright told him that his music collection was “the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.”  To which he responded by hugging me, and screaming to the room “It’s my birthday and I want all you fuckers to come dance with me!” And we did.  

It was a scene straight out of the 1960’s (and as a matter of fact, a good number of them did happen to be on acid).  Here was whole gang of us who, for that moment, in that place, stopped chasing anything, grades, love, money, fame, and we danced.  And for the first time I truly felt like nobody was watching. So remember, "I WANT ALL YOU FUCKERS TO COME DANCE WITH ME" and if everyone is busy living, nobody is busy watching.  So get busy living, and forget about who is busy watching.

Dance with your audience, not for them.